Wednesday, March 27, 2013
I never know how to begin posts. Actually, I've never been good with beginnings - in general.
I'm not good with those either.
I guess that's why I always had a hard time with goodbye's; letting go.
I never wanted for my heart to break. I never wanted to face anger. I never wanted to feel pain.
I don't think any of us do.
But sometimes, it is the best way to learn. With our questions. With our broken hearts.
It's a frightening place to be, when in the midst of pain, wounds and heaviness, and still you find the strength to say "How can I love?"
And yet there I was.
And here I am. In the most frightening of places.
Every second of every day. A choice.
To die to ourselves and let go, or to proclaim "I love you"s to the easiest of lovers. And say "But I just can't" to forgiving the very ones who reject and hurt us because let's be honest, who loves the ones who wound and break and abandon us these days anyway, right?
And with that, "Let go," He says.
It was as if in that very moment, everything made sense. It wasn't logical,
but it made sense. I could see You. In the most frightening place, I found You.
And it was peaceful. In the most painful place, I found peace.
People come and go. We fall in love. We break, we heal. We learn, we mess up.
We know everything, and in the end know nothing at all.
And perhaps the most beautiful stories grow out of a broken heart.